Remembering is not such a bad thing to do. At first all I wanted, was to forget, to forget you and all the good times we have shared. I wanted to click on delete and empty the recycle bin so that I don’t have to be reminded of you. I didn’t want to feel the pain anymore and thinking about you was painful. Knowing that you will never call again, never email again, never send me flowers again and never kiss me goodnight again, that scared me! I thought I realized that I couldn’t move on without erasing your form my entire life. Hit the delete button and try to act as if you never existed. I picked myself up and tried to move on and tried to start over.
Little did I know that the love I felt for you was true love. That it is not something that you can just switch on or off. It’s not the material things in life that reminds us of our loved ones. It’s not their clothes, books or even pictures. No, it’s the memories the two of you have shared together and no matter how hard you try to block it out, it always has some ways of crawling back into your mind.
When I walked down the street after it rained, I remember the times you would take me out dancing in the pouring rain and our laughter echoing down the street.
When I sense the smell of freshly cut grass, I remember the time you cut the grass only half way when it started to rain and you came back to bed and we just cuddled all day.
If I go to the theatre and I see young couples in love, seeing the sparkle in their eye, I think back on the times we would go to the theatre and how I would always end up resting my head on your shoulder.
When I sit in the cinema and a couple walks in, I remember the first of many movies watched with you.
When a waterpype bursts in our street, I think back on the morning when that happened at your places while you were shaving and you rubbed off all the shaving cream on the pillow and myself!
When it rains, I remember the Sundays we would spend either on the sofa or inbed watching movies, being lazy and fighting over who will make coffee.
These are just a few things that come to mind, I can continue for days, months and years to name every single thing. Some memories are beter left in the past but memories of love and happiness deserves to be remembered. No matter how hard you try to suppress it, it always finds a way back out, not always at the best of times. So do yourself a favor, don’t try to forget your loved one, remember and let their memories live on!
